Tuesday, February 17, 2004

If there is any day worst than today... I pray that I am dead before that day comes. The ex-landlord of the infamous gallery in Santa Monica cashed a check we issued for rent last September that had an NSF and was replaced with a cashier's check. This placed me under deep stress becuase now I have checks that will bounced in effect. That guy was a crook all the way, he did this to us after the sale of the property we used to occupy closed escrow. He did this with the worst intention. What an evil man! I am a person who would just walk away from trouble and forgive the wrong that was done to me, but I am learning the hard way that here in America, you have to be a hard ass and fight everything if you want to be ahead in life. That is a painful thought and it might cause my marriage directly. Why?

Because I am married to an irresponsible jerk who does not take action and instead blames everything on me while he sits on his skinny ass and do nothing. Marriage is suppose to be teamwork. Do you blame your teammates if things don't work out, NO - you try to straighten it out together. This hurts me immensely. Carrying the full load and then being blamed on every single thing. Life is not fair and I know that but I was not born a man, I was born a woman and although I wear pants, I don't want to be the head of household.

I wish I am the type of person who have enough conviction and is ready to turn her back after getting hurt so many times! Maybe, I will be... not today but maybe tomorrow.

Life sucks!